Hi Reader,
I just got off another sales call. And it was like being hit on at a bar...
It all started like this...
Someone DM'd me and I'm not sure how I got connected with them or how they ended up on my friends list or even why they DM'd me in the first place. Honestly, I don't know them other than seeing their posts a couple of times on my feed.
But what I do know is they hopped into my DMs and pretended to be interested in my stuff, asked a couple of questions like who I serve and what kind of coach I am.
He was a young buck all of about 26 if I had to take a guess and totally not my ideal client or even a person who would engage with my content. I write for moms and women entrepreneurs, busy women who have a thousand things on their to-do list.
Anyway, the next thing I knew he was asking to jump on a call and learn more about my business, won't take 15 minutes, etc. so I obliged.
Ugh...
After the initial call, he asked if I'd be interested in learning more about what they do and how they help clients, etc and how they've helped so many people like me, blah, blah blah.
Sure why not...whatcha got boy?
I was sent some PDFs that I failed to read, a video that I failed to watch, and a voice note to confirm the call, etc.
I was overwhelmed and unimpressed. This felt aggressive a little and that's a whole turn-off for me and not how I work nor how I like to be treated.
The whole thing just felt so unauthentic.
So I told them, sorry I can't. I've got a lot on my plate, clients and coaching calls, and homeschooling my 3 youngest while my husband works out-of-state running our other family business, and soccer practice was that night, and...
I was sent another voice note that disregarded all that had I just said and said, "but if we could fix all that would you be interested..."
Bruh...
So I ignored him politely telling him I was unavailable for the rest of the weekend and busy.
Then, in classic old school, bro culture marketing fashion, he DM'd me again because persistence is key, (right?) and asked to jump on the call.
I'm like, "I've got right now and that's it, take it or leave it."
So he sent me his call link and for the next 45 minutes I was asked a bunch of questions of which he did this classic marketer thing where he repeated back to me everything I said and then asked, "So, if that could be addressed would that work for you?"
Side note: The key is to get the potential client to feel understood and to say yes to every question that way when they make their $10k pitch it's natural to say "yes."
Except I didn't, I said
No
And when he asked "why" because clearly they had the exact system I needed to scale to 6-figure months and they'd helped others do exactly this and blah, blah, blah...
It all started sounding like unicorns and rainbows hidden behind their system.
I've heard it all before and I hate it.
This is what I call bro culture or bro marketing- these 20-somethings who haven't been in the game longer than I've been birthing babies or paying taxes, who got lucky and fell into quick money, with an ideology that everyone either makes or wants to make 6-figures a month selling their soul.
These guys are trained and good at one thing and that's SALES.
Sales
... and not helping people, not delivering on their promises because in those 8-week coaching programs if you fail it's all your fault, they've collected their money and there's no guarantee of success or even if what they sold you works for you or not.
And in all actuality, they don't care.
They'll say they do, but they don't.
The DMs are the equivalent of the modern bar scene (I guess I was never in that scene) but the whole goal is to get you to go home with them for the night, not marry you and take care of you.
They want you to write them a big, fat check and they'll deliver something for a short time and if you're not ready and you want to take it slow, peace out, they're gone.
Or if you didn't get all you needed out of the (ahem) arrangement, then it's going to cost you even more.
*Hint: This is where they pitch you a $30k program to work with them for a year.
Ask me how I know this....
Because, no, I've never been a single in that scene, I married young and we bought a house and made a family, but I have been talked (seduced) into one of those high-ticket programs before and been left on that proverbial "walk of shame", out a lot of money and feeling super foolish for falling for the unicorns and rainbows they promised.
And like many young women out there who fall for the nice guy pitch at the bar, unfortunately, I've fallen for this scheme, sorry marketing tactic, more than once and the hurt doesn't get any better.
So I promised myself, and God, and all my future clients that I would not work like this.
This is why I don't cold DM, cold email, or when I get someone on a call, I don't walk them through a line of questioning just to get them to say a certain number of "yeses" so that the stats say that person will say yes to my pitch.
Ugh, it's slimy and gross.
This email isn't here to pitch you anything either, it's to let you know I don't work that way.
I like making genuine connections with my clients, offering real solutions tailored to their business and their goals, and actually putting in the work-
- coaching them
- reviewing their content
- discussing ideas
- trying new concepts
- thinking about how I can make their business better and
- researching strategies specific to their industry
- praying for their business
Why? Because I love what I do.
I "fall in love" with my clients and their business and what's important to them becomes important to me.
It's how I serve.
It's why I'm selective about who I take on as a coaching client and why I give them my all when they are with me.
If you can relate to being seduced by bro marketing or if any of this resonates with you, shoot me an email. I love hearing from you.
Blessings,
Daphne
